So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Randomize
