The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
