I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Randomize
