yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
