; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
