i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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