i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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