:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Randomize
