Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Randomize
