at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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