Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize