he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
