okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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