After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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