he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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