Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
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