I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
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