Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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