the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
