you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
