Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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