i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize