I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
