he thought i was a dude.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
