was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
