just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize