I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
