Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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