My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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