She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
