Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize