I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
