The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
