my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
