508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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