Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
