it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize