Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
