And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
tell your sister to shave her snatch
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Randomize
