it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
