You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
