never play flip cup with pint glasses
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
They have beer where we have blood.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
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