oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
