Where did you get a picture of my penis
That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
