So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize
