She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
