Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
