She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
