So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Randomize