I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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