With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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