Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
